There’s a difference between an opportunity and an opening.
While pondering a change of employment lately, I realized these three things:
An opportunity pushes you to grow.
An opening just lets you continue being as you are.
An opportunity pushes you to do new things.
An opening just lets you continue doing the same-old tasks and projects.
An opportunity pushes you to take risks.
An opening just lets you play safe.
Either way, whether you choose to pursue the opportunity or the opening, there will be stress. Stress is an inevitable part of life – in fact it is proof of life. Living means moving and adapting. Moving and adapting means change. Change means stress. So, in terms of stress, you have no choice. A stress-free life simple doesn’t exist.
However, you can choose the source of your stress. Personally, I’d rather have to handle the stress of taking risks and trying new things that will contribute to reaffirming the person I am becoming, as opposed to coping with the stress of having to face the same challenges I faced as a former self. It would be counterproductive to my personal development. Kind of like doing high school all over again!
Did I leave my job then? No, for two reasons. First of all, my current position offers me new challenges continuously as the adults I teach present me with an ever-shifting kaleidoscope of needs and situations.
Secondly, my job leaves me time to pursue post-grad courses in leadership development and collective innovation.
What about you? What key differences do you see between an opportunity and an opening? I’m intrigued to hear them. Drop me a line in the Comments section to tell me about it.
I thought I’d sit down and take stock since, after all, just about every social media feed has been telling me to do so for the past couple of weeks.
I clicked open my Pictures file and scrolled down to 2010. I then opened up my journal and wrote Last Decade at the top of the page and 2010 in the margin. I began viewing the photos and writing down the highlights of each year: trips, graduations, sports events, publications, relatives…
Once I’d finished, I mulled over the list. Wow! I realized that the past decade was rich in learning and insights, mainly around three themes.
#1. The Value of Life
In 2016, my husband Vincent went into the hospital for a day operation. The doctors wanted to do an angioplasty (insert stents into the arteries). When Vincent was wheeled back to his room, he said, “They have to keep me at the hospital. I’m going to have an operation this week”. Less than three days later, he had multiple by-pass surgery. While he was in the ICU, I realized that life is as close as a heartbeat away. One millisecond it is there; the next it may not.
We both came away with a different point of view on life, and a new drive to make every moment count.
#2. The Value of Family
The same year, in 2016, I had the wonderful privilege of meeting biological relatives on my father’s side in England in 2016 (I was unable to meet my father since he had already passed away when I found him). It was amazing to feel the connection that we had even though I hadn’t been brought up with them. It was palpable. My husband and sons couldn’t deny the metaphysical link that they saw especially between my aunt and cousins.
A year later, in July of 2017, since my biological mother had moved back to Montreal, she accepted to meet me for the first time ever. During the three days we spent together, we went out for coffee, went shopping and talked about so many things. It was precious – doubly- so since I lost her to cancer less than two months later.
That was painful because I had just found her. But I take comfort in the fact that I was able to meet a number of other biological relatives on her side of the family that still live in Montreal.
Hers wasn’t the only death I experienced this past decade. I lost two brother-in-laws and an uncle, too. Death separates us from family members we love, but life continues and gives us the wonderful opportunity to keep strengthening the bonds with those we still have.
#3. The Value of Breathing
This has undoubtedly been the decade that I learned the importance of breathing. Through learning and practicing mindfulness, meditation and Bodyflow (a combination of TaiChi, Pilates and yoga), I have experienced the amazing the healing and restorative benefits of breathing deeply: heightened awareness, more powerful stress management skills and greater emotional balance.
Learning to breathe changes everything! The more I learned about it from books, practice and courses I took during my certificate in Developmental Psychology, the clearer I became on who I was and what I wanted. I retired from teaching in the school system and embarked on a career change process (which was ironic since I only just officially earned my teaching permit in 2011, after over 20 years in and out of various teaching capacities.) I just didn’t want to work in an environment whose values didn’t match my own.
I am now trained in mindfulness meditation and coaching so that I can help others develop their own mindfulness lifestyle and experience the benefits.
In conclusion, my backward look leaves me with the insight that it isn’t the trips, nor the professional, personal or academic achievements that give me the greatest buzz. It’s being able to look forward to celebrating 30 years of marriage with my husband Vincent in three weeks, seeing my sons Nick and Olivier develop and thrive in their personal and professional lives, and helping others live mentally healthier and happier over the next ten years.
What about you: what are your greatest take-aways from the past decade? And what are you looking forward to in the new decade? Drop a comment! I’d love to hear from you!
